One dawn as I was washing the dishes, this thought came into my spirit, “Don’t you find men and women who are married but still act single ridiculous?”. Okay maybe you don’t but I definitely do!!! I’m just thinking- you are married and shouldn’t be flirting or you shouldn’t be entertaining certain things and people. You shouldn’t be spending so much time out with friends doing the same old nonsense you used to do when you were single.
In my view, when you are married and the moment his last name is slapped next to your first, when you decide in front of a number of people to wife that babe up, it is established- YOU ARE WALKING INTO A NEW DESTINY. Some things you desired before MUST change. You are not your own anymore, you can’t decide when to do what and you can’t decide when not to do something. That’s just the truth! It’s one of the struggles I’m assuming people have in marriage, they want to be their own persons but in the union. They want to be ‘married singles‘ or they want to be ‘independently married!‘ I know it sounds ridiculous but I can assure you it’s a thing!!!
They want to be ‘married singles’ or they want to be ‘independently married!’ I know it sounds ridiculous but I can assure you it’s a thing!!!
A new destiny means a new destiny- being independently married was not God’s intention. God intended for the union to make us one flesh! To fuse us back together, TO MAKE US ONE (Genesis 2:24, Mark 10:8) and yes I said BACK into one flesh because like we see in the beginning, “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.” And we see again, it was not good for man to be alone which originally translates to mean ALL IN ONE. It was not good for man to be both male and female in one because purpose needed to be achieved. Therefore, marriage is God’s mind to join us ladies back to the person we were all ‘in’ and for you men to be joined back to the women who were taken out of you.
” Marriage is a fusion, you can’t be two independent people in marriage… You both need to lose yourselves completely to accommodate each other” – Rev. Benjie Djin
My dad says marriage is a fusion! It’s like fufu, where two elements are joined together through pounding to become one item. It’s funny that the Holy Ghost would use the fufu analogy, as I don’t like fufu (don’t judge me, I’ve heard 1000 times over that I have a problem lol). Anyway so as I started writing this, He said to me the cassava and plantain that is turned into fufu cannot be recognized anymore. The two ingredients lose their individual identities to become this great thing Ghanaians and not only Ghanaians know and love. As they become a new meal, they lose what you could have done with them individually in their former state. So for example, you could eat plantain with kontomire and cassava/yam with some other stew, you could boil, fry or roast the individual elements but when they come together as fufu, they lose the ability to do those things. Imagine fried fufu… ew! Or fufu with garden eggs stew lol but that’s how ‘yucky’ it looks when you get married but still want to tread the paths of a single ‘man’.
Well! Well! Unfortunately, this post is not about marriage (don’t kill me yet). I just needed to get your attention since I’ve noticed that you, my sweethearts are very interested in marriage and love related posts hahaha. I’m sorry I had to do that because you really needed to hear what I’m about to say next. When you become a Christian, you become a bride of Christ! (2 Corinthians 11:2, Ephesians 5:23) You adopt His name… so for example I am- Jewie Christ. However most of us want to act ‘single and promiscuous‘. We parade with the Christ tag but we act like the single ones (the world) with no husband. Christ, our Beloved, died for us, continues to love, cleanse and sanctify us daily yet we deny Him flatly. We ignore the fact that we are no more our own, no longer free to do whatever and live however. If we truly viewed our commitment to Christ as the marriage that it is, we won’t be living our lives the way we do. This is why our single friends (people in the world) would not desire to get ‘married’, because they see absolutely no difference in our speech, in our actions and in our lives entirely. They don’t see the fusion! They are able to easily separate our individual self from our Husband; Christ!
There is no way to separate the two ingredients, when the fufu has been made. You can’t even tell what went into it by just looking at it for the first time. That’s how our lives as Christians should be! We should be that married woman bold enough to tell her single friends she’s married and can’t be out past a certain time or can’t be seen wearing some clothes or can’t be seen indulging in some activities that brings dishonor to her Husband. As a Christian, you should be that bride who promises to honor and respect her husband, in good times and bad! We frown on married people who cheat yet we cheat on our husband in an even worse manner. No it’s crazy! We are even sometimes shy to say out rightly that we are His, we are shy to say we can’t do certain things or do certain things because we are married!
I wrote this post to remind you just as I was reminded that dawn that YOU are married! We don’t belong to ourselves anymore and we have an amazing husband; Jesus Christ who has kept His end of the bargain, who has done nothing to love and cherish us, who continues to lavish us with blessings yet what do we do? We deny Him, we bring him dishonor, we disrespect Him, we reject Him, we defile His home -our hearts & our body (1 Corinthians 1:19). We want so badly to behave like we are still single but same way it’s ridiculous to see a married person still act single, it’s even more ridiculous seeing us Christians who are supposed to be married to Jesus, act ‘single’ and mingle with the world! The repulsive imagery of fufu and garden egg stew, should be equated to that and more our behavior when we mingle with the world as if we were single. Our conversations should change, our outlook on life, our desires, expectations, motivations, the things that entertain us must all reflect the King we are married to! People should be able to see clearly the transformation that has taken place. A single and promiscuous world should clearly see that you are fused with the Living God- as there therefore remains no more you, but a beautiful union.
My goodness I’m SUCH a talker!!! I pray you understood the points I was trying to make, I apologize for tricking you odo/marriage-loving readers and I pray you were blessed by it as I was writing it.
Until next time. Stay blessed! Xoxo